Suffering does not mean that we are bad or that we are necessarily broken.
Everybody goes through pain, anxiety, and despair at some point in life. The Buddha talked about the unavoidable quality of suffering in this physical world. It is a normal part of life. And suffering does not mean that we are bad or that we are necessarily broken.
We are being advised to stay with our pain, whether it is big or small, instead of trying to escape them. In this way, we are able to release them after knowing them fully. Staying with our painful experiences and realities is one way to be mindful.
In our mindfulness practice, we can incorporate the following states of mind if we want to heal ourselves:
Opening our hearts to ourselves and to others can be the beginning of our healing from suffering. When we try and restore our trust in people and come from a place of love, we get to experience peace. Then we can be on the path to being whole again.
We are also being encouraged to show ourselves some compassion. Other people find it easy to show compassion to others, but not to themselves. We need to be kind to ourselves first—it’s an essential part of healing.
The Dalai Lama also said that if we can be happy when good things happen to others, then our opportunities for delight are increased by eight billion! This is called sympathetic joy—another component of healing. We can find joy in the midst of suffering by celebrating the joy of others.
Finally, find that balance between acknowledging your feelings and getting carried away by them. When we do, we learn to see the bigger picture and to accept the events in our lives as they are. Finding that balance leads to wisdom, peace, and the motivation to extend ourselves to others.